Tag Archive - age: 0-8

Discipline Mistake #2: Our consequences don’t fit

Sometimes in the process of disciplining their children, otherwise sane and sensible parents suddenly lose their grip on reality.

Sixth grade Kati had a moment of weakness during a math test; she peeked at her neighbor’s paper to see problem number twelve. She had never cheated before, and on her first attempt to cheat, she got caught. Her dad wanted to come to the school, so the three of us met in my office. She admitted her wrong, and sat with her head down. Dad announced that she would not spend the weekend with her friend Megan. A tear ran down her cheek. Obviously he had hit home. Then he went on: “and you are off the softball team, and you are out of the class play, and you probably won’t get to go to camp this summer.”

Whoa! Dad. I think you made your point Continue Reading…

Boys and Puppies

Mike Stoops, my next door neighbor, had a beautiful cocker spaniel named Sally. When Sally had a litter of pups, Mike and I could not wait to hold them and play with them. I remember lying on the ground with those puppies jumping all over us, yapping and yipping, licking and nibbling our ears and faces as our giggles bubbled uncontrollably from way down deep in our carefree childhood hearts. There is something almost magical about eight-year-old boys and puppies. Continue Reading…

Glimpsing the Future

Between Christmas and New Year’s Day, we were able to unpack some book boxes and get some of our “old friends” out on the shelves again. In the process, we uncovered a treasure. Patricia had kept journals for each of our children when they were very young. Opening those pages was like stepping into a time machine, Continue Reading…

Holidays or “Hollow days”? Part 2


Jim Rohn talked about getting a good meal out of the trash. He said, “If you work hard, if you search, if you are determined, you could probably come up with some good things out of the trash heap. But is that how you really want to get your dinner? Even once?”

Of course not.

When it comes to training our kids, Halloween can be that kind of experience. As adults we can sort through all the costumes, decorations, and scary movies without much trouble. It is so easy in fact that we can forget to protect the little ones who have no filters for all that stuff. Continue Reading…

DISCIPLINE: The Language of Love

“Talking to Dad is like talking to a brick wall,” I said to Mom fifty years ago.
This was my conclusion after asking my dad for permission to go to a party with my classmates. He simply said, “No, and I don’t want to hear any more about it.” I wondered how he could be so calloused, so harsh. He wouldn’t even listen to reason, my reason. Fifty years later, I understand my dad much better. His life experience gave him wisdom that I didn’t have; so he said “No.” He also knew that he could be swayed and softened—I didn’t know that at the time—so he just took that option off the table: “I don’t want to hear any more about it.”
The result of using the word “No” is that he, along with Mom, raised three kids who serve Jesus Christ in their adult years. Continue Reading…

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